Haute Nights Blogs — 05 June 2012
A friend of mine who always did magic  for fun, decided to give being a professional magician a go. He made his own website and was promoting himself as a party magician. He mentioned this to me in passing and I found out from a third party he had put out a craigslist ad trying to get gigs.
So being totally off his radar I did what any good bro would do, I set up an email account and posed as gay asian party promoter “Kong” looking for a magician for an upcoming party I was throwing. The goal was to see how far my friend was willing to go for $3,000. The following email interaction between “SexyPartys007@gmail.com” and my friend is 100% real. Enjoy!!
[I wanted to start off subtle then once he took the bait lay it on really thick. Here is my initial email.]
Hello sir. My name is Kong. I throw party in manhattan for my many friends. We have different themes.
We like magic for one of our next party. I have many question.
 
1. What kind magic you do?
2. Do you have rabbit or any trick involving gerbil?
3. How much you cost?
4. What kind of costume do u wear?
5. Do you have big hat/pants? Cape?
6. Can you bring hats or rabbit/gerbils for gift?
7. What is your best trick?
8. How long show?
9. What you like?
 
We would like to get magician soon. We have much money. Please reply.
 
Many thanks.
 
Kong
[He wrote back]
Hello Kong. Here are the answers to your questions.
 
 
1. I specialize in close-up sleight of hand and mentalism. This means
 
magic up close and mind reading. It is teen and adult oriented.
 
 
2. I do not do any magic with animals. I am assuming that you are looking
 
for a birthday clown which i am not. I cater specifically to adult and
 
corporate audiences.
 
 
3. My rates vary depending on the location, venue, occassion, date and
 
amount of people. If you can provide those things I can give you a rate.
 
 
4. I do not wear a “costume”. I wear a suit and am professional and
 
elegant. Refer to my website for photos: [Redacted]
 
 
5. I do not wear a cape or big hats and pants. Again, suit and tie think
 
corporate professional.
 

6. I do tricks that involve giveaways but they are not hats or animals.
 

7. My best trick depends on what your tastes are. I do very powerful mind
 
reading and also can change single bills into hundred dollar bills. Also
 
playful pickpocketing making things from your pocket appear in my hand.
 
 
8. Generally I can walk around the party for an hour or two and do magic
 
close up for everyone. I can also do a stand up show lasting about 30
 
minutes.
 

9. I am young, funny, charming, smart, professional and skilled at my
 
craft. I guarantee everyone will have a great time at your event.
 
Please let me know a few things about your event.
 
-Date and location
 
-Amount of people
 
-Reason for having the party
 
-Other entertainment if any that will be present
 
-Age range of the guests

Thank you for your interest and I look forward to hearing from you.
 
 
Regards,
 
[Redacted]
 
[The photos he referred to on his website were him in a matching vest and pants. I responded.]
Hello [Redacted]. I like photo on website. Our party is adult.
 
Suit vest is nice. We like cape though if possible. It like mystery fun.

Playful pocket play sound fun. We like walk around and stand show.
 
You read mind? What I think right now? LOL

Party on Thursday September 2.
 

There can be 100 people or more.

We have party so asian men can meet and play.

We have dancer “Miss Rosewood” come as well. He can be assistant if like.

Age 21-55
 
We can pay no more than $3,000.
 
Please tell soon if can come and how much $$ ?

Thanks, very much.

Kong
 
 
[Posh is a local gay bar and Miss Rosewood is a tranny performer who's always at "The Box" who often pulls whole beer bottles out of his ass drinks it, then spits it on the crowd, among other things. A simple google search would lead you to this his personal website. To offset that I follow it up by throwing out an outrageous dollar number. He writes..]
Kong I am available on Thursday September 2nd. $3,000 is fine and I will
 
be present for 2 hours. I have a contract I will email you by the end of
 
the day. You can print it out and sign it and I will give you a number to
 
fax it to.
 
 
 
I require a $500 cash deposit when I first arrive. Before I leave you can
 
pay $2,500 cash or check.
 
 
 
I look forward to entertaining everyone. Do you have a phone number to
 
call you at some point next week? I just want to get to know in more
 
detail about you and your guests and also discuss what I will be doing
 
exactly.
 
 
 
-[Redacted]
 [I definitely don't want to talk on the phone with him. Me and a couple of coworkers who I've brought in on the joke tried to work on fake accents but decide against it in fear of not being able to contain our laughter. I decide to just email him back and avoid the phone request. I take it up a notch and in case he didn't google Miss Rosewood include a link.]
[Redacted]
 
I glad you are available. Please send contract. For $3,000 we need you longer 2 hours. At least 3 hour.

I pay you all in cash.

I tell u about party. I throw sexy parties. Many men come to meet men, dance, and have sexy time ;) . We have dj play music.

We would like to see you dance and do magic. You must do sexy dance with magic.

We also like you to hand out gerbil in a hat. We provide hat and gerbils. We want men make gerbil disappear as trick. You no have to do that trick, just men at party.

We also like you host show for our other performer “Miss Rosewood” http://missrosewood.com/ . You do trick then introduce him. You may dance with him if you like. You may recieve tip.

I look forward to sexy party.

Kong 
 
[ Laid it on pretty thick there. Curious too see how he responds. He finally writes back.]
3 hours sounds good. I am unclear about the gerbil and hat part. can we
 
discuss a bit further on the phone? I need to know what specifics to put
 
in the contract. I am a great dancer and will be glad to dance and do
 
magic.
[Not wanting to ruin the joke I come up with a solid excuse as to why I can't talk on the phone. Take it up a few more notches.]
I have trouble understand english when speak too me. So it easier talk in email. I use google translate to understand some words.

All we need you do with gerbil hat. Is give gerbil to men at party. Gay men like gerbil for pleasure fun. If can do trick with gerbil nice but not require.
 
You are good at sexy dance? This great. We like you dance with “Miss Rosewood” then you get tip.

If you dance with men at party you get more tip too. You can wear thong to collect tip if you like. Men like thong. So more tip.

We also like body shot. If you do body shot you get tip.
 
If you send contract I add things I need.
 

Kong
He responds with a contract. My original plan was to have him go to Posh and then wait outside with a camera and ambush him Ashton Kutcher style when he figured out there was no party. However, in the end I felt that once the contract got sent back he might think he had $3,000 dollars coming in and make some expensive purchases that could end up fucking him over financially. So I decide against it. I just recently told him it was me like a year later and he was pretty cool about it. In his defense $3,000 dollars is A LOT of money for 3 hours of work, it would have been dumb not to at least consider it.
So, I guess the moral of this story is some straight guys are willing to do some pretty gay shit involving gerbils and trannys for three grand if no one will know about it.
HN
Post Script
Just to clarify I am not homophobic in any way. I have plenty of gay friends (some of which I let in on the joke) and coworkers and support their fight for  equal rights. The gay party promoter angle was just the best charachter I could come up with to take advantage of the craigslist ad situation.

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